Part II: The Anger

by Girlinshadows

Read part I here

PART II: The Anger

During this time I went wild. I went out partying every night, came home late, flirted with other guys, hooked up with his best friend..I didn’t reply to his texts or answer his calls, I was rude to him, criticized him, belittled him when talking about him to my friends, and told everyone I hated him. I even convinced myself that I hated him for a short while. I thought I was having the time of my life, I thought I was finally free, away from his captivity and negativity. What I didn’t realize, was that the negativity came from within myself, and not him. Everything I did during this stage, I did it either to receive his attention or to spite him. And he tried to come back to me and apologize various times, but I am the most egoistical, stubborn person, and I didn’t even want to hear it. I was so mad at him for leaving me. “how dare he leave me after all I’ve done for him?” “He’ll never find a girl like me again.” “No one will ever love him as much”. I kept trying to persuade myself I was better off without him, but in the process, I eventually wound up losing myself, along with losing him.