The strange feeling

by Girlinshadows (Theheroiccouplet)

I have this feeling that I will die early. I can just feel it in my bones, that I was born and destined to die young. I have anticipatory anxiety, and whenever I think of time passing by (for example if I am thinking about Christmas in October) I get anxiety and I start to panic. That is because I have this intense feeling that I’m dying soon, and death’s just getting closer and closer. And this scares me. Not because I am afraid of dying, but because I am afraid of living and not having enough time to do something or be someone. I feel like I wasn’t given enough time to become the person I always wanted to be, or do something important, offer something to the world. I am here for a brief second and then I’ll just be gone. I’ll be gone and no one will remember me. Because I didn’t have the time or the skill to do something memorable. I’ll be gone and all this life never would have mattered. In the very end, I am going to die and nobody will truly feel a loss.

 

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